Something wrong with my brain

You know what? Recently, I suddenly really happy, suddenly really sad, suddenly really cold to my friend although they don't notice it. I'm not dislike my friends, sometimes I just don't want to talk too much, feel tired. Weird.

As my brain's owner, I have to find out the problem. What made my brain and my emotion become weirder and weirder? PMR? Maybe a bit. Homework? I don't think so, and I'm a good student as well.

Anyway, I feel that I am tension and nervous and maybe having a psychology problem call depression. When I told my classmate this afternoon, she put her hand on my shoulder, and looked into my eyes, and said the sentence below:

"You, Rain, will never have this psychology problem forever unless the Sun rises from the west."

"......"This is my answer. Okay, I admit that I'm this kind of people.

Today is April Fool, my school was in a kind of crazy situation. Many people shouting and scolding someone. Luckily I am alive from school.><

The life in school

Please don't ask me why suddenly I talk about this topic, I also don't know why I will choose this topic. Maybe I just want to talk teachers' bad word.XP

I'm in Form3E, I call this class as "the class of reflection". What's the reason? This is because "3" and "E" are two characters that represent each other's reflection, so I call them like that. Actually I decided to use this as the theme of our class' notice board, but I'm not the organizer, so I just forget it, let it stay in my heart forever.XD

Okay, nonsense's too much. Back to the topic. In my class, I've knew many new friends. Majority of them are funny people, have a sense of humour etc. I like to make friend with sunny, happy and weird person. What kind of weird? Erm... They may be weird in their personalities, weird in their writing or weird in their brain. I'm also a weird person. My brain always full of jokes. What kind of jokes also have. Examples? Secret lah, just for my friend to be happy in the future so can't tell first.

My teachers' turn now. I don't know is the teachers are teaching the next generation for helping them or just simply take their salaries and others are not their business. My mandarin teacher, my first image of her is: What kind of teacher is this fellow? I think my mandarin's standard is better than her, creativity of my mind is better than her and maturity is better than her. Firstly, she makes many errors in pronunciation and explanation. Secondly, she can't accept a essay that is more modern than her sample essay. As an addition, the modern that I mean is not like the pop English songs like that, it is more interesting and more fun in it. Finally, she always laugh for her cold jokes. I'm not making fun of her, I just really can't stand this kind of teacher.

Next, my BM teacher. I decided to write her name out but for my peace school life, I just keep quiet. She's the teacher that don't have understanding in her personality. I've told her that my friend has her reason for her absence. My friend always sicks. But, the teacher said she just wants to find a excuse for truancy!!! Oh my god, I never seen this kind of teacher appear in the world before. Since that day, I really dislike her FOREVER!!!

Phew, Okay, complaining is end. It is already end of March now. Just have about seven months to go. Hope I can get over it and study in my ideal class next year. I am hypnotizing myself to study hard to get 8 As in PMR, I know I always write this matter in my blog, but this is also a kind of hypnosis too.^^

What do you want actually?

Today, I give my mother my exam paper. Really pity, I mean the marks. I get 88% in Mandarin, 85% in English, 82% in Mathematics, 66% for KH, 60% for BM, 56% for History, others I haven't know. I thought these marks except History, KH, and BM will 100% pass in my parents' heart.

But, they don't think so. They said,"What? Mandarin just get 88%? How come? Mathematics just 33/40? It's so easy! If next time comes out many difficult questions how you answer it? And what's wrong with your BM?"

When I heard all of this, my heart sunk. They said I never study at all!!! Hey, I'm the most hard working in my gang, how can I don't study? I prepare it myself quietly, no one knows. I study myself silently, everyone don't know. Everything is so quietly, silently and softly. I bought a lot of extra workbooks for myself, I wish I can improve myself. But, what I get in the end?

They said I am so proud of the marks that start with digit 8, is it enough? I know it is no enough, but, I've study. I've hard working. I've try my best. No one say to me"You've done well. Get it on." and more. Why? I don't want to talk anyone, just write in my blog. I hate to say these things through mouth. I don't those eyes look at me sympathetically. I want to show my happy face to everyone, not the sad face. I've done this within these years. I success. But, what about me?

Never mind, I just do my character properly. Then, maybe I can achieve my dream in one day although my first dream was ruined. I'll do my best, never make anyone that concern me so much disappoint. I'll remember the one who hurt me so much, and want to say thanks to her/him that her/him make me be strong.^^

御手紙 Otegami

I decided to cut my hair

because the position at your side has been vacated

But fretted over whether I should paint my lips red,

for I don't know you

With what little ability I have and all my might,

I try to speak of my pining for you

As daybreak clears away,

ceaseless thoughts lead to dawn

To a sinful you,

I offer this - the reason I was born

Unstructured prose

Adeptly

Adeptly

Wishing only for that

I decided it has to be today particularly

because the sky's so blue

In days when my legs will tremble at your call

, I shall quietly intrude

Time has ripened.

After that and so forth,

cross the line into the other side of the door

The one who has served you most in bygone days should be,

above anyone else,

none other than myself

If you'll deign to keep me at your side

with some relief　　

I'll always keep

My appearance

The way you fancy

To a sinful you,

I offer this - the reason I was born

Unstructured prose

Adeptly

Adeptly

Wishing only for that

The one who has served you most in bygone days should be,

above anyone else,

none other than myself

If you'll deign to keep me at your side;

with some relief

I'll always keep

My appearance

The way you fancy

Oh my god!!!

My headache still killing me, my brother told me to see a doctor immediately, don't end up like the actors in the Korean Movie,die.Hey, who am I? I'm Rain, right? How can I end up like that so sad?><

I try to get over it by myself, not a doctor. And, this year I will take my PMR, don't want to disappoint my parents, my friends and my brother. They have give me a lot of encourage and...Pressure...XD I know, this is for my own good, but I still feel really pressure... Hey, 8As you know? According to my results, if I want to reach it, I must be work very hard. Thus, I bought a tons of extra works for myself, including Mandarin. Everyone knows my Mandarin really good, but I still want to do it right. So for sake, I bought my first Mandarin extra workbook...

Anyway, got to work harder in this year, for my dream, for my parent, for my brother, for my ICT. Sail for!!!^^

Can you please don't do it to me?

I know, you don't like me, and I'm trying to make you as my friend, not a lover. Do you know what am I thinking? Your acts make me feel disappoint. We really can't be good friends? Just like a pair of siblings also can, too.

I know, another "you" treat me as sister, and I'm trying to do my best in my test, not in love test. Do you know what am I thinking? Your cold jokes make me feel happy. We really can be a brother and a sister? Just like a pair of soul mate also can, too.

You, my heartbreaker. You, my nightmare before. You, my diary's constant customer. You, my brain's virus.

Another "you", my Handiplast. you, my sweet dream. You, my diary's forever customer. You, my brain's Kaspersky.

The 'you's are two different people. Oh, you want to know who are they? Guess it.^^

Today Lazy To write In English,paiseh

我，就快要疯了！！！很多功课还没做啊！！！我数给你看……

1）Mumtaz 的6篇作文

2）Mumtaz 的 objektif 练习 x 7页

3）Theory 钢琴的

4）美术2种不同的图画


再加上我的颈有很像扭到了，现在痛到求生不得，求死不能啊！！！T.T





P/S:- 还请各位帮我祈福啊~~~